The journey of finding one's own personal truth is one of the most vulnerable and liberating things you can do for yourself.
Mary Helen Frank-Murphy
"I found my light again.
And I realized that I want to help others do the same.
To be happy. And that is why I am a coach."
I was born on a Navy base and spent my first five years moving across the country several times. My parents divorced when I was 10, and my brother and I lived with our mother. My mom found it difficult to support all of our needs alone, so we lived with grandparents, in a domestic abuse shelter, at our aunt’s, and in Section 8 housing. My brother and I were often home alone, and I soon found the responsibilities too tricky and moved in with my father. A more stable environment, although less attractive. After attending eleven schools, I heard just one high school for the remaining four years.
My mom worked hard to earn a degree and finally became the nurse she had always dreamed of. She was diagnosed with dementia in 2009. I took over her finances, spent many hours filing paperwork, handling her debts, finding her care, securing Medicaid and Social Security, setting up her medications, grocery shopping, and meeting all of her other needs. She died in June 2020. I am learning about grieving a parent and finding the grief much more profound and vast than expected.
I met my first love, Michael Frank, during my senior year of high school. We married a year after graduation and built our house on his family farm a year later. Our daughter, Jordan, joined us in 1997 and made us a family.
I had suffered from a heart ailment since birth but was healthy. I began growing ill a few years after Jordan was born. After many tests, doctor visits, and procedures, I was diagnosed with Lupus. Mike and I decided to get as healthy as possible. We began working out together, which led to losing weight and discovering a newfound passion for running 5Ks, half-marathons, and doing sprint triathlons.
In 2011, Mike developed pain in his leg while playing basketball. He endured test after painful test and eventually had back surgery in early 2013 that was unsuccessful. Mike endured recovery from surgery, pain medication, spinal injections, and more, and nothing worked. He suffered unbearable pain every day. He eventually succumbed to an accidental heroin overdose in early 2016.
I met my coach at a Texas conference in 2016 and agreed to enroll in coaching, which changed my life forever. Ken coached me through identifying the survival mechanisms that were now holding me back. I found my true essence again, my authentic self. I found my lost life purpose and my voice. I sold my home, moved to a new city, began dating, and retired from my career. And then I met and married my love, Paul.
I want to help others find themselves and be happy. And that is why I am a coach.
Mary is one of those people who I immediately felt confident in. I had a sense right away from the beginning of our time working together that she was in my corner! What I love about coaching is that I have a person to bounce off the troubling things of life with and I know that together we will find some new solution that was not something I could access myself. Mary is so generous and shares what she is noticing with me in a way that really helps me to reflect and consider new perspectives and to better understand myself. I would definitely recommend that you try her out as a coach!